Just when you think that you have thoroughly organized everything; that nothing could possibly go wrong as you have arranged everything as per your to-do list and crossed checked it a million times and you finally subconsciously pat yourself on your back for being completely in charge of the situation; it is at this time you realize that there are external forces at play that might completely pull the carpet off your feet! A series of funny (well, in retrospect, I do find the incidents funny-though I did not share similar sentiments when they actually occurred) incidences made me realize that we are not so organized after all, that even after going through our to do list a million times, there are certain things which might just get left out; that even if we put our best foot forward, we might goof up and thanks to the collective paranoia of our peers, things go haywire!
This realization dawned on me a couple of weeks ago while attending a wedding in Delhi! Having attended a couple of grand Marwari and Punjabi weddings in the past, I convinced my modest Bong conscience to pardon me for having spent a sizable part of my salary just to get the accessories and costumes in line! I got my entire family (my husband and mother in law) to shop around and get new clothes and accessories in place! (I know Hiren will never forgive me for coxing him to purchase and wear the blingy and shiny foot wear (mojdi) ;-). As the day of our departure to Delhi approached, I cross checked and rechecked whether we had everything in place! I made a long list and ticked everything off while packing! I never felt so paranoid during my wedding! After all, my wedding was a simple affair! I asked Hiren a million times whether he had the flight ticket printouts ready with him, whether he packed his stuff, whether he has kept the cash and cards safely and what not! After having done all the packing on Friday, me and Hiren went for a stroll post dinner, having satisfied ourselves about putting everything in place! How could anything possibly go wrong now? I now realize how optimistic I was back then! L. Right from the time of post dinner stroll, goof-ups began to happen in various degrees!
First goof-up: Insomnia before flight!
We had an early morning flight scheduled at 8:00am for which we were supposed to reach airport by 7:00am for which we were supposed to leave home by 6:00am for which we were supposed to wake up by 5:00am! And it more often than not happens with me that just when I know I am supposed to wake up early, my system plays a bad joke on me and turns me into an insomniac L I just couldn’t sleep! I And Hiren, being the nocturnal bird, chose to remain awake till 3:00am watching sitcom knowing fully well that he was supposed to wake up at 5:00am! I tried reasoning out with the part of brain that was responsible for inducing sleep! Understand! You have a flight to catch! You have to wake up early! Go to sleep! You have a long day tomorrow! Buzz off! You have a lot of functions to attend! You need rest! But no! If you remain awake, you will look like a Dracula with dark circles in the function! My sleep, it seems played hide and seek with me and I almost remained awake till 5:00am! And what was the effect? Just when I was supposed to feel fresh and energetic, I woke up with dark circles and felt groggy and irrigated to start off with! L. This is certainly not the way you would want to start off your trip!
Second goof-up: Wrong terminal!
I smartly asked Hiren a million times whether he had the e-tickets! Hiren, as usual, replied in full confidence and assured me not to worry! This is his patent dialogue “Tension mat le, sab control me hai” When we finally reached the airport, and showed our e-tickets to the guard, he smiled sarcastically and informed us that we were at the wrong terminal! As we were travelling through Air-India, it was an International flight and we were to go to the T2 terminal which is approximately 10 to 15 minutes by auto! I felt like a fool! I mean, how we could not check our e-tickets? It was so dumb! I looked at Hiren angrily! He had the e-tickets! He should have checked! But there was no time left for arguments! Some rickshaw walas, sensing our confusion, offered to drop us till the T2 terminal by charging us 500 Rupees! He thought we are not from Mumbai! After all, a Mumbaite would have the common sense to check his e-tickets in case of Air-India flight, which at times departs through international airport!
Third Goof up-Bags flung off the taxi rail:
We got rid of the rickshawwala who wanted to rip us off for a short fair and finally got a taxi for T2 terminal! The taxi driver hastily kept all our bags on the top of the taxi in the square shaped luggage grille. Due to lack of time, the luggage bags were not fastened with a rope. Just when we were on the highway, Hiren very coolly said “I think our bag fell off the taxi” I wonder how he could be so calm while saying this! I mean, it could have been the bag in which we kept all our wedding cloths and jewellery! I mean I know that he is stoic but this is not the time to display stoicism! I was panic stricken and yelled at no one in particular! Instead of asking the taxi to stop, Hiren only looked out of the window and said, “I am not sure whether the bag fell but I did hear some noise, we will check when we reach the terminal as there is not time to stop in the middle of the highway!” I just wanted to jump out of the taxi and run on the highway in search of the bag that apparently fell! But Hiren, as usual, was holding guns and did not allow the cab as he was not 100% sure whether the bags fell off! If we stop the taxi for searching the bags, we might miss our flight! If the bags with the wedding cloth did fell off, we might have no wedding cloths to wear and would be compelled to attend the wedding in shorts and jeans. I was so confused and panic-stricken that I couldn’t argue with him either ways. Once we finally reached the airport, Hiren counted the bags and assured me that the Bags had not fallen off but were merely shifted off its place! Whoof! No words would suffice to convey the relief I felt then!
4th Goof ups related to gifting:
After finally reach the air-port and completing the security check-in, when we were about to sit peacefully in the waiting lounge, Anagha asked “What about the gift?” We are going to the wedding, what are we gifting?” Imagine! I was shopping since the past one month and completely skipped planning for the gift! I again looked angrily at Hiren as the thumb rule between us is that we start with the assumption that it is always Hiren’s fault, if something goes wrong! I mean I had hundred and ten other things to take care off! He should have reminded me L. While I am cent percent sure that Hiren forgot about it, he covered up by saying that he had always wanted to buy something from Delhi so as to avoid carrying it! What a lame excuse! Nevertheless, Anagha, being the creative one, decided to pick up something from the Airport and selected a beautiful pair of wine glasses from the Mumbai airport shop to which we all agreed unanimously! Once we reached Delhi and were waiting at the hotel reception, we realized that we did our next goof up! Anagha forgot the wine glasses in the washroom at the Delhi Airport! So it was like, buying a beautiful pair of expensive wine glass at the Mumbai Airport for the purpose of gifting it to the cleaner at the Delhi airport! It may sound noble, but it doesn’t feel so especially when it’s a last minute arrangement for conveying that we haven’t forgotten our social courtesies of failing to bring a gift after coming all the way from Mumbai!
5th Goof up-High during sangeet:
Punjabi-Sardar weddings call for a free flow of alcohol! The sangeet function was at its Punjabi best! Amazing food, awesome music, attractive people made for a heady cocktail! Hiren thinks it is his moral duty as a husband to ensure that I drink myself to death ;-)! In all my drunken excitement I forgot that my mother-in-law was also present in the sangeet function! I was dancing to the Bollywood music to my heart’s content, as if I would never get to dance again! I saw my mother in law sitting quietly and in my inebriated state did no find it quite right to let her sit all alone! I pulled my mother-in-law to the dance floor and forced her to sway to the tune of Bollywood music! Looking at my state, she did oblige and danced quite a bit but I crossed my limits when I said I would not let her go off the dance floor J and that she will have to dance with me till the end J I now realize why alcohol is considered as one of the biggest vices L I am lucky to have a broad minded mother in law who later laughed off at the whole episode! The other day on my mid-night birthday celebration, she told me, with a mischievous smile, “Esha..dont drink much, as you have office tomorrow and I am too tired to dance with you throughout the night today 😉 J 😉
6th Goof-up-Wade robe malfunction:
During the next day of wedding, while searching my luggage for the dress that I was supposed to wear for the wedding, I realized that I forgot to pack the salwar for my anarkali! I mean, this was completely off limits! How could I be so careless? I panicked! My mid started racing! There was no time and money to shop! All my funds were already exhausted! This time, Hiren looked angrily at me! How could I forget something so basic? In order to address the wade robe malfunction, I wore jagging beneath the anarkali J Look at the picture above;-) Luckily, the anarkali was very long and hence not an inch of jagging was visible! Had it been shorter, the jagging chain near my ankle would have made me look like a fool! J
These were the major goof ups! I do not want to pen all the other goof ups here as I would end up writing a short novel on the blunders committed by us collectively! Nevertheless, I believe that these incidents made the lovely wedding all the more memorable! We enjoyed, despite of all the goof-ups and that, I believe, what matters, at the end of the day.
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